Monday letter

Dear Mike,

I was going to send you an email and then post pictures here for you....and I decided to just say it all here. Our neighborhood is great. We went to the park after naptime. Andrew was almost having convulsions from park withdrawl. We haven't been in 3 days! GASP. We went to the beach Saturday and of course didn't go Sunday and so by this afternoon it was ALL he could do to wait for Emma to wake up from her rest. I took the kids to Sherrie today for my appointment and Sherrie said he asked "can you take us to the park by our house?" He's always looking for his next park hit. The kids rode their scooters to the park. I uploaded pictures and I realized all my pics of Andrew on his scooter were really blurry! I thought it was the camera- then I realized it's because he's so fast. He's a natural athlete and is fast at everything he does. Emma is happy to scoot along at her own pace, in her own world, doing her own thing. There were some other little girls at the park today and they all had AMERICAN GIRLS. You can imagine the joy in her voice when she told the girls that SHE TOO had an American girl and her name is Molly and she has line braids and glasses and they wear matching dresses to church. They had a great time at the park and every day there are more and more kids there.



When we came home I went to the curb to get the recycle bin and bring it in and Beth came out to talk to me....90 minutes later we had eaten pizza in the street, the kids were FILTHY and we had all laughed about pogo sticking- it's a great neighborhood. A really great neighborhood.


Of course even after all the outside time they had were the kids ready to follow me into the house?


So, we took a couple snapshots and then finally went in. I LOVE the picture that Andrew took of Emma and I. I love her face- dirty with sweat, dirt and pizza and how she's not even paying attention. Andrew was SO proud he got our heads in this picture. He knew right away he wanted to sent it to you on the computer.



Finally I came downstairs from putting the kids to bed at almost 9 p.m. I was clearing up the table and found that Emma had glued the E-M-M-A from the wooden ABC puzzle on a peice of paper along with the words LOVE and DADDY which she had written.(She used the M and the W turned upside down to make 2 m's.) She loves you. She misses you. She always always prays for you- and sometimes that's all she prays for.

Saturday morning I could not have been more excited to flip the calendar to May. April just would NOT end. But, wouldn't you know it's only May 3rd and I'm already thinking "is it STILL May?" I'm still waiting for that part that people say comes when it "gets easier." But, for now it's the same. For now the daylight hours are filled with keeping as busy as humanly possible. After that darn sun sets and the chores are done I stretch my feet across the couch and wish you were sitting at the other end. Your half of the bed continues to look as big as the Red Sea when it's empty. And, you know what? I hope it always does.

Today I was reminded in a funny way that not everyone misses their husband like I do- or at least don't show it. Today before I had a chest x-ray the doctor said "I just want to make sure there's no chance you're pregnant?" I said- oh I'm sure- my husband is in Italy. She then looked at me with bigger eyes as if to say "and..." so I looked back at her with the same big eyes and said "and I'm not a ho." Seriously?!?! I'm married. Doesn't that mean anything anymore?

When I put my ipod on to listen to music while the cleaning gets done I love to take the trips the songs take me on. The Dixie Chicks take me to a little black car in the Philadelphia suburbs 10 years ago. The songs remind me of that first summer we dated. The first summer and we were in mad love- with this "life" we imagined for ourselves. I never ever imagined cleaning with an ipod on, thinking about when I'd get the water pump in our car replaced, folding clothes and washing mad amounts of black soot off of our kids before they went to bed. I'm not even sure how they got that dirty. All those amazingly fabulous fantasies left out me writing you a letter on the other side of the world so that it is here for you when you wake up six time zones ahead of me. But, somehow it's not crushing. Because there are smiling pictures on our mantle of this amazingly beautiful family we've made. There was a Mother's Day card in mailbox for me today from you and after all these years nothing means more to me than your words. They are more melodic to my soul than I can tell you. All of this is beautiful. It's crazy, it's faster than Andrew on a scooter, and it's exhausting. But, it's ours and I love it.

I hope you have a great day....

Love you tons,

Brooke